Skipping Christmas in My Zombies Blog

This past Christmas was not one of my all-time best. I spent it away from my family and opted out of spending money on big-time presents. It was just the dog and me. And it rained the whole time. But I would still prefer my lack-of-holiday celebration than reading Skipping Christmas.

I’m a big Grisham fan, at least I was for the longest time. Skipping Christmas is the 15th book I’ve read written by John Grisham. But this one was different. Way different than all the rest. Instead of mining the legal dramas, Grisham is veering into uncharted territory. First, it was nonfiction. Now, it’s ridiculous screwball comedy. For all my complaints of his shortcomings, I prefer his legal ramblings. At least he’s writing what he knows. He definitely does NOT know comedy.

This one felt like he was trying too hard. As if he was writing for a laughtrack and attempting to cash in a very large paycheck. He surely got it… but at what price? Skipping Christmas was a #1 New York Times Bestseller, but I feel that has more to do with his past stories than the current one.

This is a miserable man in a miserable story. Hoping to save $6,100 (last year’s total amount from Christmas expenses), Luther Krank hopes to opt out of Christmas. With his daughter, Blair, out of the house and off to Peru with the Peace Corps, he talks his wife into — you guessed it — Skipping Christmas. Luther Krank despises Christmas. But more importantly, he’s an accountant and he hates wasting money. So, he decides the family will boycott not only the holiday, but the decorations and goodwill toward men.

Luther and Nora plan a 10-day Caribbean cruise during Christmastime and they quickly become the pariahs of their social circles. Nora’s petty, materialistic housewife frenemies hope to guilt her into submission… or force her to throw her annual lavish holiday party. Luther fights his self-appointed holiday neighborhood dictator, er, I mean decorator, hoping to get Luther to join the others… for the sake of the others. Nothing like a holiday-themed guilt-fest. AK.

With names like Krank, this is a stereotypical anti-Christmas story that will most likely end with the Kranks changing their names. Or attitudes. Whichever one is cheaper. I wouldn’t know, since I gave up by page 90. I’ve never given up on a book before, no matter how much I loved or loathed it. However, Grisham has cashed in all his chips and totally sold out, and I absolutely refuse to buy into it for one more second.

Oh, and there’s a movie based on this book as well, called Christmas With The Kranks. I thought I’d enjoy reading the book, because the movie looks horrendous. Boy, was I wrong. And the book may be worse.

For all you Grisham fans: Go read A Time to Kill. It’s his first novel, and still his best! Make sure to skip Skipping Christmas!

Strength: Honestly, there isn’t one. Not. One.
Weakness: Total Grisham sell-out, cash-grab for holiday bucks.
WTF Moment: I could just hear a cheesy laughtrack in my mind, with every ridiculous thing Luther Krank did, and I hated Grisham for it.

Notable Quotes:
– “The catch is simple. We don’t do Christmas. It’s a complete boycott of Christmas.”

Review: 1/5